Have you ever loved someone so much that you would do anything for them?
Well, make that someone yourself!
Self esteem is one of the most important aspects of our life. The relationship we have with ourselves will define our relationships, career, sex life, and social life. Most importantly it will define our emotional state and play a big role in our mental health and life satisfaction. Low self-esteem might not be a diagnosable disorder but it’s the root for many mental health disorders. Are you being kind or harsh to yourself? Do you neglect your own needs? Do you have negative thoughts about your self-image or personality? Do you feel appreciated? Do you struggle to say ‘no’? Most people forget or have never known their true value. That’s what they learned in childhood. It is time to unlearn unhealthy thoughts and behaviors and challenge false core beliefs. Many of us think we are not worthy or that we are unlovable and that our goal is to please others. Believing in our true self and our self-worth will unlock our hidden potential. Building your self-esteem is essential in order to live the life you dream of. Your confidence, your self-love and self-compassion are the keys that will change your life.
Social media, apart from being an important part of our life nowadays, affect how millions of people go about their daily routine—and in a negative way. The number of likes can ruin someone’s day. A negative comment can destroy someone’s mood. A decrease of followers can be the reason for someone to start doubting themselves. Comparing ourselves to photoshopped images can distort our way of thinking, cause emotional distress or even make us want to distance ourselves from our friends and family. Prolonged social withdrawal is a symptom of depression. Should we like photos we don’t like just to get some likes in return? Should we let our self-esteem be impacted by the opinions of others? Should we compare ourselves to others? An image is not who we truly are. A post on Facebook cannot define our true identity; unless we allow it to.
There are times when we are under the impression that we love ourselves only when we are having fun. I had been doing that for years; attending parties every night, drinking, having sex and having a loud lifestyle. I thought I was doing great. Well, what I was doing was searching for instant, short term gratifications, while ignoring long term consequences. How can someone love himself or herself and not think of their future. Where is the love when we sabotage our career or we feel empty when returning home after a party or having sex without being conscious of our actions? Self-Punishment is a more suitable term. I am not referring to expectations or not being able to live in the present; I am talking about the fact that everything needs to be experienced without going to extremes. I am in favor of living life to the fullest. But moderation will help us grow in all aspects of ourselves and also be able to experience the joys of life many times over. If we do the same thing every day our pleasure will diminish dramatically. We think consciously and then we act.
I have met so many people who have been treated disrespectfully from their friends or their colleagues. I have met people who have been abused in so many different ways by their relationships. I have seen beautiful women believe they are ugly or think they deserve to be treated like trash. The sight of a broken spirit is sad to watch. It is not your responsibility if you have a low self-esteem, because life experiences can be the cause, but it is your responsibility to escape from it. You are NOT worthless. You are good enough to be who you choose to be. You should be respected. You deserve to be happy.
We will take a good look at what it means to love who you are. I will help you replace your negative thoughts with realistic ones. Your confidence will be restored. You will get to reintroduce your ‘self’ to the new you. I will empower you to believe in your abilities. You will take care of yourself. You will feel good about yourself. You will assert what you want and speak your mind. You will stop being manipulated. You will build healthier and stronger relationships. You will pursue your dreams.
Dr. George Lagios
PhD, M.Sc. (CBT)
Dr. George Lagios holds a master’s degree in psychology, specifically in cognitive behavioural therapy, and a PhD in sexology. He is a professor of Psychosexual Therapy and author of two best sellers Would You Choose You as Your Parent? (2018) and Inside Your Mind (2020). He is also a clinical mental health counselor, psychotherapist and speaker. He has received the President’s Achievement Award from the Hellenic American Association and continues his research work on erotic desire.